2004-03-15 - 2:30 p.m.

So this entry was going to be another chapter in the “Tao of Bruce series” but it seems my “real” life has gotten more interesting. Which begs the question: when did my life turn into a porn movie?

I’m recovering from another “Lost Weekend” and while there were no run ins with the law, no missed aircraft, and no Old Man from New Amsterdam (to the regret of many…some more-so than others) it was pretty much a repeat of the last one. If anything it was more intense. Forget making faces I never knew I had the muscles for, I’m broke in places I didn’t even knew the human body had. Hell I can barely walk today thanks in no small part to a Rockstar Goddess in black leather fuck me boots who I swear is an incarnation of the goddess Ishtar because truly men in Old Babylon carved statues of sex and death to her.

THIS ENTRY HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE MINISTRY OF ACTION INFORMATION SECRETARIAT FOR BEING FAR TOO TRUTHFUL. WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED SHOWING OF JESUS CHRIST: VAMPIRE HUNTER, ALREADY IN PROGRESS

“I can’t hold this blood sucking bitch forever J.C.!! If you’re going to kill her do it now!”

“Peter, you’re my rock! Don't punk out on me now!”

“You can’t kill me, Son of God!” the vampire shrieked.

Jesus aligned the masterly carved wooden stake and drove it though the beast’s heart with single blow of a hammer.

“You forget that I’m also a carpenter’s son.”

Join us next week for another episode of the WB’s hit show Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter.

previous - next