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2005-01-24 - 8:48 p.m. 11:30 am Of all the places in the City that Gonzo missed the most from his time living in Singapore he missed the Kasbah most of all. It was a surprisingly original little enclave on the edge of City Center, running from the Mitchell Airport commerce zone to the old Jet-Set Euro enclave. It had been started up by African expatriates: traders mostly, which meant smugglers and pirates. But unlike Night City or Little Saigon or even Hong Konglywood, it had little crime and great atmosphere. It was like the whole place was designed around endless courtyards and walking avenues, like an endless openair bazaar. It was Casablanca, Constantinople, Marrakesh and Timbuktu all rolled into one. Gonzo loved this place when he lived in the city and right now he was back in his favorite restaurant, Achmed’s, enjoying a leisurely smoke from a hookah while he waited for his lunch. Achmed’s was a great place, a restaurant built around an open courtyard straight out of the Moorish places of Muslim Spain. Low tables and divans where you reclined rather than sat. You could kill an afternoon at Achmed’s, enjoying a languid seven course meal, with breaks for a massage in an upstairs parlor, an intimate encounter with your mistress in one of the small, perfectly appointed rooms that were available, or even some business, selling bootleg weapons, uncut gem stones, raw opium or defecting scientists. Once, Gonzo saw a complex swap involving three hundred kilos of Manchurian heroin, the severed head of a mnemonic courier, two cases of Kalashnikov rifles, and a pair of tickets to Cats all go down over four hours of roast lamb and Turkish coffee. God I missed this place. 12:05 PM Suki grunted as she finished her three hundredth sit up. With all the work she did running this damn company, she wondered why she even bothered with her workouts. It’s not like I’ve got anyone to impress, she thought glumly as she picked up her matched set of tonfa knight-sticks and cued up the sparring program. A lithe blond woman carrying a bo staff materialized and attacked. Suki shook her head. “What was it with the Boss and blondes?” Suki parried the attack and countered, “killing” the simulation with a head strike followed by a drop leg sweep and, just because she was bored, a “People’s Elbow” finisher. She fought her way though another 5 holos, varying her attacks but always ending with a WWE finisher before Vittoria walked in. Suki terminated the program and grabbed a towel. “Is recess over already?” she asked, wiping her face. “Uh…sorry, I can wait until you’re decent.” “Huh?” Suki looked up and saw Vittoria had turned her back on her and that the back of her neck had gone flush. She wondered why Vittoria was acting so odd when she looked down at her naked body. She looked back at Vittoria. “Wait. Are you embarrassed seeing me naked?” “I…didn’t realize you were…weren’t presentable,” Vitrroia stammered. Even with her back turned Suki just knew she was blushing. “I’m so sorry.” “You are so weird,” Suki said, snorting with laughter as she finished toweling off and, for the sake of Vittoria, changed back into her low-rise jeans and Hello Kitty t-shirt. “There, I’m all dressed.” Vittoria turned, red faced. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know….” “It’s okay. Why are you so freaked out? We’re all girls here. Its nothing you haven’t seen before. Hell I can’t count the number of time Gonzo and the Boss and god knows who else walked in on me bare ass naked killing raptors and shit.” Vittoria continued to blush. “I guess I’m just not used to…uh, nudity.” “What? You’ve never, I dunno, changed in a locker room or just hung out with your friends eating pizza naked?” “No. I was in a combat training cloister until I was 17 and afterwards I was always on the job. And, you know, my papa is His Holinesses Captain so I got a lot of privacy. I guess I’m just used to lots of clothing.” “NO WAY!! What about the beach? You swim naked, right?” “I’ve never been to the sea shore, unless you count beachhead assaults….” “NO, IT DOESN’T COUNT. Well what about guys? How do you have sex if you’re…wait. You do have sex, right? You’re not a virgin are you?” Vittoria turned a shade redder and said nothing. “OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!” “Well, I am the Captain-General’s daughter….” “No shit. Total Catholic School Girl. And not the naughty porno kind. I guess having a Papal assassin for a dad is kind of a libido killer…. Wow. I didn’t know.” Suki just stared at Vittoria, seeing her in a whole new light. “I guess when I met you I just assumed that you were one of the Boss’ sex kitten assassins. I mean, you’ve got the looks for it and….” “Can we please talk about something else?!?!” Suki blinked. And then started laughing. She walked up to Vittoria, who was on the brink of embarrassed tears, and gave her a hug. “Hey, Mary-Sue, its okay. We can talk about something else. I was, just, you know, surprised and shit.” “It’s okay. Really. Uh, lunch is here. I just wanted to know if you wanted to eat.” “Cool.” They sat at the big desk in the main office eating lunch: Suki with her delivered sushi, chicken wings and Kirin beer; Vittoria with her yogurt, salad and protein shake. It was quiet at first but finally Vittoria spoke up tentatively. “You know, Gonzo walked in on me working out this morning in the Action Station. He seemed surprised I was wearing my combat uniform.” “Yeah, I guess all the times Gonzo’s walked in on me and the other Angles working out, I guess seeing a pretty girl killing something while wearing clothes was novel. Damn it, they always skimp on the wasabi when they deliver. I need to have a fucking talk with Ichi.” “So, uh, are you and Gonzo…?” “Huh? Oh God no!!” Suki snorted. “Gross. Gonzo’s like my older brother. I’ve known him for ages. And I’ve walked in on him and enough of his hoochies to know that I’m not his type. Why are you asking about…. Oh. MY. GOD. You’re not….” “Huh? No, wait….” “OH. MY. GOD. You’re blushing!! YOU ARE!! You’ve got a thing for Gonzo!!!!!!!” “NO!! I was just…” “Yes, yes you do!! Holy shit, it’s starting to make sense. The way you look at him, the way you start to blush and fidget when he’s around. You’re smitten!” “AM NOT!!”
Gonzo was enjoying his malt beer and roast lamb kebabs, when a shadow fell on him. For a moment he considered drawing his gun (one of his guns) but he realized that Achmed would have security at least as good as the Ghost of a Chance. He looked up and saw The Girl. “Well shave my balls and call me Sally, if it isn’t the Annie Oakley of Bethnal Green.” “Well if you really want me too…,” the tall platinum blonde said, her accent that perfect West End Bond Girl purr. He stood up and gave her a hug and a kiss. “Sit down. Or rather lie. Help yourself to some smoke and food.” She reclined in the divan next to him. “It’s good to see you baby,” she said. “I wish it was under more pleasant circumstances.” “So when did you hear?” “Just last week. I’ve been incommunicado for a while, you know how it goes. Queen and fucking country.” She picked up the other hookah pipe piece and took a puff. “I can’t believe he’s gone.” “Me too baby.” “I mean, he’s bloody Actionhero you know? I saw him kill a demoness with a piece of paper. He’s the man. Or rather was.” “Look, for what its worth, I heard it was a good death.” “Blowing up some giant robot and saving this reality from Horrors from the Beyond. Yeah, he would have wanted it that way.” “And you get a nice bike out of the deal.” The Girl smiled. “Even his last words to me were dirty.” She sighed. “Now what about you. I could have sworn you were going to die in Singapore. When did the bounties get lifted?” “They haven’t been. I just had to smoke a hunter today.” “You’re fucking kidding me!! Then why are you still here? Gonzo, the combined price on your head is higher than the GDP of half of Africa.” “That’s a really a bad example, when you think about it.” “You stupid bastard. You think you’re goddamn Han Solo.” “Well in a certain light I do favor a young Harrison Ford. And I can out draw any Greebo this side of Kessel, if you know what I’m saying.” “This is not like you. If you’re doing this out of some weird guy thing about Actionhero’s memory….” “It’s not for him. It’s for Suki.” “Who?” “The last Girl Friday.” “Oh, the one he left the company too. What about her? You sleeping with her or something?” “God no! Besides, you know my type.” “I certainly do, you dodgy geezer.” “ANYWAY, Suki’s like my kid sister. She took ‘Hero’s death really hard. And running the company, I’m worried it’s too big for her.” “What? Come on, all Man of Mystery, Inc. ever was, was a tax shelter and a place for Actionhero to keep the stuff he either stole or had made for his adventures. It’s not a real business.” “Actually, it kind of is now. It turns out ‘Hero had a lot of fingers in a lot of pies, and I’m not just being dirty. Especially here, in the City, Man of Mystery, Inc. is a serious player. And now, with Actionhero gone, some people might start getting ideas about a takeover. So I thought I’d stick around, maybe lend a helping hand where I can. For her.” “Does she know about the risk you’re taking?” “No. She doesn’t know anything about the bounties on my head. And she’s not going to, understand? As far as Suki knows, I lived in Singapore out of choice, for my armory business. I’ve just relocated here out of a sense of nostalgia.” The Girl looked at Gonzo and smiled. “I never saw you as the selfless type. I guess I was just more turned on by your bad boy mercenary image.” “Well if you want, you can just pretend I’m being paid for this.” “I don’t know. I think I could get used to a heroic Gonzo.” “I thought you liked bad boy mercenaries?” “Yes, but you know how I have a weakness for heroes.”
The ninja had attack had been going on for a little over half an hour. Suki and Vittoria had already lost track of the amount they’d killed. But more kept coming. “Where the fuck are they coming from?” Suki thought over the digital telepathy link, twin Endless Clip .45s in her hands as she shot three ninjas who just appeared, watching them crash through the windows of her office and fall to the street below. “Teleport rigging on their armor,” Vittoria thought back as she blasted away at another wave with the M-16 she’d grabbed from the gun rack across the room. “Don’t we have scramblers or something?” “They must have found a new frequency to ride in on.” Vittoria dropped the empty rifle and ran to a ninja who just climbed though the window. She drove the heel of her palm into his hooded face, hoping her aim was right. She felt his nose cave in as she drove his sinuses up into his brain. Grabbing his limp form she pulled him inside the office and started to check his armor. “If I can find out how their blinks work, maybe I can find a way to jam their signal, or something. Cover me.” “Got it. By the way, you ARE so into Gonzo.” “I AM NOT!!!”
The Girl looked at Gonzo as she sipped a pint beer. “You know, maybe I should stick around the City for a while. God knows I could use the vacation.” “You sure?” “Yeah. And you know, I kind of owe him. For that time in London.” “Well it would be nice to have another familiar face around here.” “You’re getting nostalgic in your old age.” “That and I like having people I can trust.” “You know, if the price on your head gets any higher, I might just turn you in myself.” “You’d have to catch me first.” “How do you know I don’t have you already?”
Suki finished bucking her sword belt and grabbed a fully automatic shotgun from the gun rack. Vittoria was already in the elevator, strapped into the massive rotating gatling cannon’s gyromount rig. On her arm, the combat runes on the Magus Gauntlet were already glowing. Suki got inside and the doors closed. “It’s an Oni?” “Yes. They got it in the lobby before I jammed their teleport frequency.” “Remind me to call the repair crew.” “Already did.” “So into him.” “AM NOT!!”
The Girl smiled as dessert came. Baklava and Turkish coffee. “So are you seeing anyone Gonzo? In a romantic capacity, I mean.” “Not at the moment.”
Suki stood over the decapitated, bullet riddled body of the Oni and wiped her ensorcelled blade clean. Vittoria slipped off the gyromount and rubbed her shoulder. “Are too.” “AM NOT!” “Girl, you want him. And you know what, you’re his type too.” “Let’s go smoke pot.”
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